The Fight
by losingcontrol92
Summary: The fight between man and wolf is always there, but when your imprint is hurting the fight for control it twice as hard.


**A/N: This was inspired by a friend who has been forced to deal with such a horrible experience and mirrors that of my story 'Failure'. I would love to know what you think.  
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**The Fight.  
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He can feel it. Her hurt and pain coursing roughly through his veins. It finds its way to his heart, pulsing through the arteries, setting the core muscle of his body alight with agony. His wolf attempts to form tightly bound ropes around his heart, anything to protect it, to hold it together, to stop it from breaking. Because right now _she's_ what matters.

Both wolf and human recognize the instinctive pull to heal her. Whilst his wolf believes he can fix her, his human is doubtful. This isn't the animal world and there's no simple cure or act of sympathy that can heal the heart-wrenching pain she's forced to deal with.

The human's lost. His wolf begs him to reach for her, to hold her, to piece back the fragile shards of her being. But he's fighting it. Fighting the irresistible and undeniable pull to her. Because he's frightened. He's the alpha and he should know what to do, what to say, but he doesn't and it scares him. He's afraid to hold to her, to touch her. He's lost for words, the overwhelming sense of fear and pain leaving him speechless.

This feeling of uselessness and loss is strange yet familiar. The night that left her scarred for life had found him lost in this world of despair. A similar fight between wolf and man had presented itself in the following days of the accident. His wolf longed to hold and heal her whilst his human struggled to fight the urge. But the animal had won and his imprint had accepted both man and wolf.

He robotically manoeuvres his way around the cosy kitchen, her kitchen. His hands instinctively reach for both ingredients and utensils as he works on a small supplement of sandwiches. He wants answers, he wants to know why. Why they deserved this pain? After everything she had faced, brawled and overcame why _she_ still deserved to this pain? But there are no answers and his mind is forced back into the world of the animal, where everything happens for a reason and nature takes it course.

It takes all his power to fight the phase, to constrain the wolf and allow his human the time to heal alongside his mate. It's not easy, the hurt and anger calls out for him to phase and run, but he can't leave her. He won't leave her.

He assembles the sandwiches, placing them neatly on a plate before aligning them alongside some juice and one of her signature muffins that the pack had clearly missed earlier in the week. His wolf hearing senses her movement in the bedroom and he picks up on the small sniffles she's attempting to hide from him. He sighs to himself, mentally preparing both wolf and human.

He takes to the stairs quietly, tapping softly against the wooden carvings of the bedroom door. He waits for her soft reply, fighting the wolf's urge to force himself through the door. After a few seconds of silence he admits defeat to his wolf and opens the door before gracefully entering their bedroom.

The ropes tightly holding his heart together quickly loosen as he catches sight of her fragile form beneath the lavender quilted blanket. Her eyes are scarred with pain, evidence of tears still present. Her beautiful features already tainted by the soft scar tissue, fails to hide the exhaustion and agony both body and mind are experiencing, the remnants of tears painting its worn canvas. Her delicate hands have wound their way into tight knots, grasping at the quilted cover almost as though clinging on to a fragment of life.

He clears his throat softly in an attempt to wake her from her detached state. He watches as her eyelashes flutter against the worn skin beneath her eyes as she attempts to writhe from the pained world she has fallen prisoner to. Her orbs finally focus upon the exhausted man in front of her and a soft smile graces her lips. He mirrors the smile with a small nod of his head, gratefully accepting her small show of emotion.

"I..uh..made some sandwiches, just… I think you just eat something" he announces to her gently as he approaches the bed.

She nods, a sign of acceptance to both him and herself. Shuffling herself to lean against the carved headboard, she allows him to place the cool metal tray upon her lap. He nods again, his eyes stained with emotion his lips tightly wound into a sympathetic yet hurt smile. His wolf begs him to stay with her but his human is confused, a few seconds of silence lace away before his human forces himself to turn away ashamed at his inability to comfort her. His feet lead him back to the bedroom door, the light of the stairway calling him.

"Ca…can you stay with me?" a small desperate voice pleads.

His heart both breaks and swells at her plea. To hear his strong imprint so desperate and defeated almost breaks the human, yet the wolf delights in that fact that she needs and wants him at such a time.

"Always" he replies tenderly as he turns back to her.

She smiles, and although it doesn't light up her eyes or cause those small ripples in the soft scarring of her features he knows this smile is real. He walks back to the foot of the bed and causally leans against the hard carven oak. She holds the tray steady with one hand before patting against the smooth lavender quilt beside her. He nods more to himself than to her, as if reminding himself that she wants him by her. He gently eases himself at the edge of the bed, his hands reaching beneath the quilt to warm her feet. A similar smile graces her lips, such a simple and familiar act reforming the hope for normality back in her.

Her eyes return to the tray in front of her and he watches with ease as she tears small segments of the sandwiches away before placing them to her lips. They remain in silence as she continues to plough through the small mountain of sandwiches before she eventually gives up and hands him the tray to place on the floor beside the bed. After doing so they return to their positions, the pad of his thumb gently pushing against the smooth skin of her feet. Her eyes flutter to focus down on her hands, her fingers fidgeting against the patterned quilt.

She feels him watching her and she can't help but allow the wave of guilt to drench her core. "I...I'm sorry" she barely whispers.

"What?" he asks gently, although they're both well aware that he heard her.

She lifts her head, their eyes meeting. "I'm sorry" she replies more audibly, "It… it's my fault" she explains.

He sighs in fury, his wolf enraged at the situation forcing her to feel like this "I… god Em…" he can't help as the wolf takes over a fraction of his control, and he doesn't even register that he's punched the wall until the familiar tingling of his skin's fast healing notifies him.

He turns to her see her looking back into her lap and he pushes the wolf back. He quickly makes his way to her, settling in front her. He curls his finger to push against her chin, lifting her head to meet his gaze. He notices the tears threatening to fall from her eyes again, "God Em, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare yo-"

"You didn't scare me, I know you're angry" she cuts him off softly.

"Yeah I'm angry but not with you. I'm angry that you're forced to go through this, that… that you feel like it's your fault."

"I was carrying your baby and I lost it. I couldn't protect, I couldn't… I just lost it, I lost our baby… I lost your baby and… and it's all my fault" her words are lost to the tears as she shakes his hand away from her face and once again her gaze drops back to her lap.

"Em, Emily look at me" he orders softly and she's briefly reminded of the many times she had told him off for attempting to use the tone of the alpha with her.

But nonetheless she complies as his hand reach out to softly wipe at her tears.

"This isn't your fault, I don't know how it happened or why it happened but I know it wasn't your fault" he states strongly.

He sees the disbelief flash through her eyes and his fingers gently trail against the pattern of scars on her face, "Do you remember that day? The day you accepted me as your imprint?" she nods against his hand and so he continues, "I remember everything you said that day. That if guilt lay at the root of our relationship then nothing would flourish, that nothing could grow in such a dark place. You told me…" he meets her gaze pointedly, "_you_ told me that somethings are out of our control. Even though I should have been in total control of my wolf, you told me that my body had taken over, that I couldn't have and never would have been able to control the situation that day."

She smiles reminiscently, "But you still didn't believe me" she pointed out.

"I..I know" he sighs with a small laugh "But you were right, I wasn't in control that night and I lost the fight to my wolf. And I know you Em, I know you fought for our baby but you weren't in control, you couldn't have been in control. You protected our baby Em, but your body took over. And… And I know right now you won't believe me, but this isn't your fault."

She nods in acceptance, his thumbs wiping away at the remaining tears. "You should try and get some sleep" he points out softly, noting the dark hollow indents beneath her eyes.

"Will you stay with me?" she asks her voice ridden with emotion.

"Always Em, always" he replies before leaning into place a small kiss to her forehead, inhaling her intoxicating scent.

She shifts slightly in the bed allowing him entrance beneath the comforting quilt. She turns on her side, her eyes following the small pattern of rain upon the window. Her cool skin moulds itself to his warm curves, her fragile form fitting against his hard yet comforting chest. His arm winds itself around her waist his hand settling down upon her abdomen, his heat almost taking the place of the now empty void. She sighs into his warmth and the fight diminishes as both man and wolf settle besides their mate as one.


End file.
